A Letter To No One.

Dear friend,

I am writing to you to tell you that I am doing good in life but I am confused. I am confused because I spent a lot of time thinking about how there are so many broken homes in this city and all over the world and bad things are happening out there and I don't know how to fix that. I don't know how to help fix it except promise myself that I will never let myself give in to the desire of doing bad things and maybe that isn't humanly possible so I promise that I will try. And I don't know why people think that what they do doesn't matter because it does. Every inch of it does. All the pauses in the universe and all the time we take up forming our sentences and the little seconds I start walking just a little bit slowly to see the night sky and the moon sandwiched in between two tall buildings, it all leads up to something such as now and such as today and such as the time somebody shouted at me because I was late. 

So I know the things that we do matter. And it mattered when the robber shot somebody I loved in the head and a whole house fell apart and this sombody I loved had gray hair and he never completed his last poem. And it matters when a bomb goes off in the city and everybody misses the eyes of the person who goes away. And it matters when your sister cries or your brother cries or you mom cries or your dad cries because you feel things for people you love too. And I think it's just a colossal mess and everything is a chain of events and we come somewhere in between that chain. So we matter too and when the ball is in our court, I hope that we find the strength to direct it the right way. 

There is war and there is hatred and then there is this. My hands are cold today and I am trying to find comfort in my favourite book that I bought only a few days ago. And I know that somewhere out there, there is fear and there is anguish and I am quiet in respect for that. So I'm trying to figure out how to do something that will stop another bad thing from happening and right now all I can work is right here with me, it's my own hands and my own eyes and my own stomach that sinks at the thought of other things and other people. 

So this is my life today and I live in a broken world but there's always a but and maybe that's because there are things like hope and dreams and a thing called strength to counter all of this so I will try to do that today. It's like they say, it's not over until it is. And I'm trying not to say things I don't mean, not even to a little girl so last night I just read things from her favourite book to her and she liked it. I liked it too. Things sound good when you mean them. 

Thanks for listening. I am infinitely grateful. I am infinitely blessed. 

Love,

Me.